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My boy turns 1 year old tomorrow and I am sitting here thinking about many of the things that God has taught me through this little guy.
First off, I think back to the year or so that we wanted to start trying for children but couldn’t due to a minor surgery Ali needed to have, insurance complications, and other factors. We just prayed. We finally thought we were able to start trying only to find out that we weren’t going to have maternity coverage for 10+ months. Ali spent well over 100 hours on the phone with insurance companies and brokers to find out if there was anything else we could do. We kept hearing the same answer, “wait 10 months.” We kept praying and asked our friends to do the same. One morning Ali was out of the house and I was in the kitchen when she called me in tears. She said that the insurance company just called her out of the blue to say that they were going to waive the waiting period for maternity coverage. Insurance companies don’t just do that. God heard our cries and answered our prayers. We began doubting God’s love & power, but He remained faithful.
Then there were the months that we tried to get pregnant, but couldn’t. While it was less than a year, it seemed like an eternity. With each passing month we became more and more tempted. Ali genuinely rejoiced with her friends as they got pregnant during that period of time, but it was still a struggle to see God as a loving Father who knew what we were going through. Then April 11, 2009 rolled around and I woke up to the news that my bride was pregnant. God was faithful once again.
From the day she was pregnant until the day she gave birth I was tempted by the fact that I thought something bad may happen during the pregnancy and our little boy wouldn’t make it to term, if at all. I was consistently helped by my friends and wife who reminded me that God loves my boy far more than I ever will (and I love him a lot). Sure enough, on December 15, 2009 we drove to the hospital where my wife would give birth the following morning. I once again saw the foolishness of doubting God; He was kind and gracious in giving us a very healthy son (although He would have been just as kind and gracious had our son not been healthy).
After he was born I was once again confronted by fear that something might happen to him, but thus far God has been merciful and we have a healthy 1 year old.
While my son can’t say anything other than “dadadadadada” he has taught me a lot about my Heavenly Father. He has taught me that what is impossible with man is possible with God. He has taught me that when I’m unfaithful (fear, doubt, unbelief) God always remains faithful. There is no guarantee that my son won’t be diagnosed with a serious illness, but even if that were to happen I can trust that God would use it for our good and His glory & that he would give us grace to walk through that horrific trial.
Most of all my son has taught me how much God really loves sinners like me. I’ll never forget reading the Jesus Storybook bible to my son in the hospital when He was one day old and coming to the part where Abraham was about to sacrifice Isaac (foreshadowing of calvary). In that moment, I saw the gospel like I had never seen it before. God opened my eyes to see how much it cost Him to give up His one and only son. It cost Him what He loved the most.
I love you son and someday I hope to teach you as much about Jesus as you have taught me.
The Deckards from ForYouLoveMe on Vimeo.
Whit slept the first and last hour of the flight and was up in between. Could have been worse, so we are grateful.
Off to do some sightseeing today!
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
Happy Birthday to me. :)
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